With Peter Davison, Janet Fielding, Sarah Sutton, Matthew Waterhouse
Janet - (to Peter) I was on tour when you were announced, and I had never seen All Creatures Great and Small because in those days you didn’t have video recorders…
Peter - No, no.
Janet - And, um, I’d always been working in theatre. People [were] going “oh, you lucky thing!” You know, all these women…
Sarah - (laughing) Who is this person?
Janet - “You lucky thing”…and I’m going, “who is this person? Who is this sex god?” -laughs- But actually, it just turned out to be Peter Davison.
Peter- That’s me, sex god.
All - (laughter)
Peter - …I’ve got a lot of lead in my pencil, you’d be amazed.
Matthew - Oh! Which of course reminds me of the subject of condoms…
Peter - Oookay.
Matthew - …which we are going to bring up… -laughs- regarding…
Sarah - (laughing) Well, you might, Matthew.
Peter - The what? The subject of what?
Janet - Oh dear, I can hear them rolling back the tape now…
Matthew - (struggling to speak due to laughter) No! In Sta- In Stratford John’s costume!
Janet - Oh. All the joints in Stratford John’s costume needed to move, to breathe; so they put, they put…
Peter - Yes, Janet?
Janet - They used condoms for the join.
Peter - Look! I’ve got my arm around Matthew here. Now this is the one thing that I couldn’t do to either of my female companions.
Janet - Yes, there’d be none of that snogging stuff that goes on now.
Sarah - (chimes in) Oh, no.
Janet - Every time you turn around, they’re snogging!
Matthew - What? Doctor Who and the girl?
Janet - Yeah.
Matthew - Doctor Who and the companion…
Janet - Yeah!
Matthew - …are snogging?… Really?
Peter - Are they?
Sarah - Times have changed, eh?
Janet - David Tennant… -exhales-
Peter - Well, he snogged someone else, he didn’t snog the companion. He didn’t snog Billie.
Janet - Well, Chris Eccelston. Chris Eccelston was snogging away…
Sarah - Billie Piper?
Matthew - (echoing) He snogged Billie Piper?
Janet - Yeah!
Peter - He snogged, yeah he snogged John Barrowman.
All - (laughter)
Peter - No, he did, it’s true! Trust me.
Matthew - Snogging John Barrowman, that’s the equivalent of putting your arm around an actress.
Peter - Now, David Tennant kissed the other, the girl who played in one of the stories… the one about the French um…
Janet - Oh, Madam Pompador.
Peter - Yes. Yeah, so he, so he snogged… I’m sorry, we’re getting off subject here. It’s Four To Doomsday part four and things are getting interesting! The Aborigines are dancing, Matthew and I are hugging…
[Note, this commentary was recorded in Nov 2006; many snogs were still yet to come.]
Matthew - I’m sure that your celery has grown. Look at that enormous qu-[inaudible]
Peter - It grows when I’m insulting my companions.
All - (giggling)
Janet - I think your celery should’ve talked. I think that would’ve been good. It could’ve been another companion, the celery. I think the celery a) should’ve had billing b) should’ve been able to talk and it could’ve been another companion.
Peter - I think… I do think they should’ve…
Janet - One more [companion] wouldn’t have mattered!
Peter - I think they missed a merchandizing opportunity.
Janet - Whenever we’re in doubt, you discover some new capability you’ve got. If only real men were like that!
(Janet and Sarah laugh, Matthew joins them a second or two later.)
Matthew - Please!
Peter - Ah. Those two hearts pumping, that’ll be enough for you.
Sarah - Well that would do it.
All - (laugh)
Janet - What’s happening there Pete?
Peter - I… I… I can’t breathe!
[The Doctor continues to hyperventilate on screen.]
…I think that’s all is happening there.
Sarah - (suggestively) You never know.
I keep hearing about the gold that is Peter Davison and co’s commentaries; one day it may be enough to get me to actually shell out for DVDs